Sunday, April 15, 2018

G9, P4: The Meaning Of Life


Third time's the charm, amirite??


Judgypants: "MmmHMMM."

Same, tbh.


New boy.


Lester survives to old age.

"Meh."


And Stella has baby number three. This is Dennis Racket's child, btw, not Wei's.

Little Erik rolled "evil' and "absent-minded" for his traits.


Not bad, for a Racket. Maybe he'll look more like Stella.


Sinbad: "I smell something rotten."

Virginia: "*sniff* I smell fun!"


"BOO!!!"

"AHH!! You bitch!!"


"FUCKOFF!!!"

Turnabout's fair play.


"What the hell, asshole?"

"You had it coming, you ugly freak!!"

You'd think Sinbad would end up dead but no, Virginia disappoints me, again.


"Nasty!! Put some clothes on. Nofuckinbody wants to see your stick ass!"

"Shut up, Stella! Like you're anything to look at."


"Freak, do not compare us. I've gotten three guys to marry me. All you've got is some dipshit who was new to town when he met you. Even he doesn't like you anymore. When's the last time you woohooed? A few days before you had your freak offspring?"


"That's right, you slut. Go watch tv."


LOL! Stella never lives for long. And Virginia likes to see me spend whatever death flowers she manages to grow.



"I am SO tired of this shit."

"Same, bitch. Same."


She had a flower.

Grim: "Wonderful! I haven't gotten one of these in ages!"


Nice of you to cheer for your son, Stel!

"Like I have a choice."


John: "Tryhard."

He rolled perfectionist for his trait.


"Ew, gross old man and the freak k-i-s-s-i-n-g!!"


"He's not wrong. But still, "



"Look asshole, do NOT come into MY house and insult my alien-freak-cousin-half-sister-whateverthefucksheis. That's MY job and you suck at it!"

John: "She's going to make a scene, isn't she?"

Like Meryl goddamn Streep.


Sinbad: "Cool! We're both mean-spirited!!"

Stella: "That's nice."

These two are kind of MFEO but the relationship would never make it the length of one drink.


"Nice for me, not you."

"Y'all are blocking the cake."

Wei: "That is one very nice pool out there."


"Come ON man, you're makin' me tap my feet! MOVE!!"

"I'm just going to put this dish in the dishwasher and look straight ahead. I have no peripheral vision at all."


"Are you all fucking kidding me?"


"This party sucks!!"

Virginia: "It's Stella's fault."


Keep tapping them feet, kid. It's gonna suck some more.


"This party totally shit the bed and that suit is stupid."

"You look ridiculous in orange."


"*sigh* I never should have left the swamp."

"That explains a lot about you, kid."

Mary: "I cannot believe Wei put us on the back burner for this insane woman."

Fun fact:


While Wei was technically single, both Mary and Blaise are his romantic interests. Of course I invited both to the party.


"Seriously, Wei, what were you thinking?"

"Um, I kind of didn't."

Next morning......


"I've thought about it."

And?


Alrighty then. This should go well.


"I'm in the mood to see a ghost."


"We are OVER, Stella. I'm breaking up with you."

"Say what?"


"You are a horrible, heartless, empty shell of a person! I never should have married you!"

"And yet, you did."


"And that was a huge mistake! One that I can fix. We're done, Stella. I want nothing to do with you."

"Do I look like a give a shit? I'll go out this door and find somebody hotter. What the hell are you gonna do?"

"I've got other women in my life!"

Yeah right, you're raising the baby, sucker.


So you're not going to kill him?

"He's full of shit. I'm not THAT horrible."

You're a Fox, hon.

To my great surprise, Wei survives the breakup intact.


"You okay, Stella? I heard you and Wei fighting."


"And that's your business how, exactly?"

"Uh, well, it's not I suppose. I was just conc.."


"Leave me the fuck alone, Lester! You married that damn freak, go bug the shit out of her!!"

"Whoa, okay! Uh, sorry Stella."

After a day of NOT killing Wei and Lester, (what the hell is going on with you, girl?), Stella goes to the bowling alley for a night out.


It went well.

Oh, hang on...


First we had to watch my simself's ugly-ass husband (I married Juan Darer, of all people) die of old age.

Me: "Juan!! No! We never got the chance to make children to live under Twinbrook's bridges!!"

Stella: "You married HIM?? On purpose??"

ANYWAY...


Aww.



Oliver Greenwood: "Wow, Stella! I didn't know someone so beautiful even lived in Twinbrook."

"Yeah, thank god I wasn't born here."


Me: "You are your father's daughter."

"Don't listen to that bitch, Oliver. She's every bit as jealous as that grotesque sweater suggests."

"He's married, Stel."

"So?"

"And she's right fucking here."


Holly Greenwood: "I just love this new tv the bowling alley installed. There's nothing like seeing the Housewives on a nice, big scr.... what the fuck?"


That would be the sound of Stella getting her wish.


"OLIVER!!! What are you doing??"

Me: "Holly, you may want to sit down and shut up. Let the faithless whoreboy go and save your own ass."

Holly: "What? What are you talking about??"

Me: "Trust me, Holly. I may be new to Twinbrook but I am not new to the Foxes. I know what I'm talking about. Sit down and shut up."


"*sigh* This is the best day EVER!"

Yeah, he's not worth it, Holly.

Five minutes later...


"Bitch, I know all about you and your relentless stalking of our family! Stay the fuck out of my business, or ELSE!!"


"Oh my fucking god, Stella!"

"Heh-heh, I got laid, Holly. Didja' see? We did it right there in the photobooth."

"Fuck off, Oliver."


"It'd be a helluva lot easier to stay out of your business if you didn't spread it all over town like fucking herpes!!"

"What did you just say about me?"

"You heard me. You come waltzing into Twinbrook, set fucking flames to the place, burning every damn body you come into contact with like the damn firecrotch you fucking ARE!!"


"You ......... you ugly, worthless, bottom-feeding PIG FUCKER!!! I oughta...."

"What? You ought to WHAT, exactly? Tell you what, Stel, I've dealt with eight, EIGHT fucking generations of Foxes, sweetie. You think you're so special? You don't even crack the top ten."


"You're gonna wish we'd never met."

"Bitch, I wish for that every fucking day."


You're going to die again, you know.

"Totally worth it."



"Uh, maybe I should go say something?"

"Yeah, you do that, Oliver."


"You think you know me? You don't fucking know me, AT ALL."

"I wish, Stella. I really, really do."


And so my simself dies, again, while mourning quite possibly the ugliest sim I have ever hooked up with, and I've hooked up with the male version of myself.


"Uh, Stella? Did you ............ did you just kill that woman?"

"Yeah, Oliver, I did."

"But ... why??"


"It's .......... it's what we do."

"We?"


"Foxes, Oliver. I'm a Fox, and Foxes kill, so I'm told, over and over, by everyone."

"So it's true? Everything she said is true?"

"I don't know .............."


"Miss Fox, you're going to have to come with me. You're under arrest for the murder of Kristin Simself."

Holly: "It's a good thing you showed up, Officer. You're damn lucky, Oliver! That could have been YOU!"

Stella: "Yeah.................. *sigh* .... You're lucky, Oliver."


"Really damn lucky."