Monday, February 5, 2018

G9, P1: Doin' The Carlton

"And then I was all 'bppppppppppt'"

"LOL! You shoulda been "nyeh nyeh nyeh!!!"

Grim must really like it here, he always sticks around for a little while.

Last chapter was a big one. Stella went to China all by her lonesome, killed some dude's wife just because she had the nerve to be upset that her husband kissed another woman right in front of her, and got her ass arrested. As a result, I was left in simless no-man's land with no active sim and the ability to click on absolutely nothing. Instead of quitting and going back a save like a smart person, I went into Edit Town, chose some poor family to split up and send one member to SV on vacation, and used NRAAS to force the game to make the Foxes my active family, then discovered I can right-click on portraits in family trees, which allowed me to bring Stella back. The game isn't terribly borked yet, but trust me it's coming.

Also, Virginia got a live-in boyfriend named Lester, whom you can see messing around with Grim.

Darlene: "So it's not that I don't like Tyler, I do, it's just that Stuart is SO much better in bed. I think he's just had a lot more practice, know what I mean?"


"Don't talk to me, again, Darlene. Ever."

"You bitch! I was gonna get in some Pilates before work!!"

"I said no talking, Darlene."

She'll be back.

"Damn, that was one helluva dream."

Sooo, anybody orrrr??

"No, not JUST anyone. .......... Hi, it's me! I was just thinking about what you said and I think I'm ready. ................ Of course I have. ................ Why don't you come on over here? .......... Great, I'll see you soon. ........... Yes, I promise."

"Hey Tyler! Your sister, niece, roommate, whoever ......... that weird green chick let me in. I'm so excited to finally hear from you!"

"Yeah, thanks for coming over, Olivia."

"I'm telling you, Tyler, I'm so happy you took what I said to heart.  The whole station is relieved that you've finally seen the error of your family's ways and want to get better. We can go down to the station whenever you're ready. I even wore street clothes so no one will mistake it for an arrest."

"That's great, Olivia!"

"Your ghost will look so pretty."

"Ummmm, you promised, Tyler."

"It was a pie crust promise, Olivia. Easily made, easily broken."


Olivia is was the cop who kept arresting, or a least thought about arresting, Stella.

"They think they can change us."


After this, two more additions to the family come down the pike.  One,

Generation 9 is finally on the way.

And two, see the adoption wish waiting to be locked in up in Tyler's wish panel above?

I had really given up on Tyler, but he's proven me wrong and then some, so I figure he's about to become an elder, he's earned it.

"A little help, please."

Meet Caspian Fox, an elder kitty with only one trait, adventurous. Don't get too attached, you're not going to see a lot of him. I even locked all of his motives save for energy. Think of him as a cute, mobile piece of furniture that will need to sleep once in awhile.

Caspian: "I'm cool with it."

Virginia wished to get married, like all good, knocked up sims.

Lester's survival instinct must be broken because he said yes.

They had the quickie kitchen special, not only because I just did the wedding thing but,

bitches be busy, yo.

However, sometimes bitches have to wait. Carlton is in the school building, I honestly cannot remember if he is a teen or if he works there. The timing of Virginia's wish tells me that he's a teen who likely got an A or made honor roll. Regardless, he's not out yet so you gotta wait, girl.

"That asshole told me I looked like a frog, and his kiss was shit."

OH RIGHT!! Carlton is the guy who I had Virginia kiss to break the frog spell all those weeks ago, only to have it fail.

"I'm telling you, the Dragon Cave was HUGE! Such a bummer that I couldn't spend more time there."

"That sounds really neat, Stella! I've never even been out of Sunset Valley."

This is Herman.

Does he look rich to you? I don't think he is but I'm not sure what the threshold is.

"Hey, maybe we can travel somewhere, someday!"

But Stella likes him. Maybe we'll give it a go, and if he's not rich enough for her LTW, no big. She'll find someone else to marry.

"Sure! I'd love to break up with my girlfriend and go out with you!"


Stella: "Wow! This is the first time I've done it in an actual bed!"

Herman: "You'll like it. It's a lot more fun this way."


"Marry me, Herman! Before someone wishes to kill you because I just love you so much!!"

Romance all over the place today.

There. Now everyone can wish to kill him all they want.

Herman's stats. He's got no suitable skills for his job, not that he's going to see the end of that wish anyway.



*cue Hallelujah chorus*

Meet Jadzia Fox. She rolled for her traits and is a genius who loves hot weather.

I've decided to change up the trait determinations again. If I can choose a trait, I'll roll the dice. On a 5 or a 6, the sim will roll again for evil, mean-spirited, or hot-headed. We'll see how it goes. I'm trying to strike a balance between having to have half a dozen kids in hopes of getting one suitable one, and having 2-3 kids who perpetually wish to kill each other and dry up the death flower supply. I think I will go back to "if they kill as a teen they automatically get a family trait as a young adult", excluding insane as I'm sick of that one.

Jadzia looks marginally less alien than her mother.

I'll do the generation 8 kill tally at the end of the chapter.

Carlton finally gets home that night.

"Moron left his door unlocked."

It doesn't matter. He's unlucky so he's not going to DIE die.

"I'm happy to do this again some day."

Stella tracks down Herman's ex, aka her new nemesis.

This does not bode well for her LTW.

"But he's hot!"

Hey, it's your LTW, what do I care?

"Bye, bitch."

"Oh for fuck's sake! Do I have to listen to this??"


"We live HERE?"


My simself has room to spare.


"Tyler was right, these ARE really good!"

"You're who??"

"Herman, Stella's husband."

"You married Stella? On purpose?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Why wasn't I at this wedding?"

"We eloped."

"Oh. ............. Good. Eloping doesn't cost me anything."

"Yeah, Stella seems pretty private. She wanted to get married right away. That's what love does, right?"


"You get this whole house to yourself?"

"Yep. Can go anywhere I want, do anything I want."

"Eat anything you want?"

"I don't need to eat anything at all. Haven't ever since I moved in. This house is magic, I'm telling you. These people are idiots but the only way anyone's dragging me out of here is in a body bag."

"So is the trash up for grabs, then?"

"Sure man, go for it!"


"Damn this is really fucking boring."

Get over it, Virginia. Herman and Lester are busy, and lord knows no one else is going to do it.

"I've got shit to do, too!"

You do not.

*sigh* He's still in the school, so you're stuck teaching your kid to talk anyway.


Stuart also has to wait.

"What the fuck for??"

"I'm pregnant, you asshole."

"No you're not!"

**fast forward about 12 hours**

"Heh-heh. Thanks, kid."

Oh, and somewhere in between...

Virginia gets Carlton again.

"You're one ugly bitch."

"So original, you asshat."


Count your blessings. I never thought you'd make it this long.


Stella: "What? It looks like fun!"

Virginia gets to go first as she's already up at 3am.

"Stupid bitch. I never get anything to myself."

Stella gets her turn at a marginally more reasonable hour, but before Carlton disappears into the school building.

"Heh, this IS fun."

"You're ugly AND fat."

"LOL! Wrong on both counts, you dumb jock."

It's not a contest, you know.

"You're keeping score."

And you're losing, by a lot.

"He just makes it so easy."

Of course.

"It's fucking freezing out here, you jackass."

You didn't have to go out in your bathing suit.

"That's looking pretty good, don't you think?"

"Why aren't you dying?"

"Time to give you a head."

"Hey, snow!!"

Morons, both of them.


"Took you long enough."

"Oh come on! He's not even dead!"

"Attempted murder is still..."

"I KNOW!! Fuck off."

So Stella gets in the police car to spend her last few pregnant hours behind bars.

Or she'll disappear altogether. This little trick of yours is getting old, Stel.

She was still showing up in Virginia's family tree.

"What the fuck was that?"

You were "out of town". Overwatch would have reset you but I didn't feel like waiting.

"So glad I didn't miss this shit!"

Just get to the hospital.

**hours later**

"I don't like it."

Mmhmm. He needs a name.



"Is there a problem?"

Why John?

"Why not?"

Daw!!! Someone got Dad's hair.  Soooo, this is John Fox. He rolled for his traits and is an evil, couch potato. He's already a lazy ass slacker like his mother, don't know what's not to like.

At least his grandfather is glad to see him.

"Whoa, what the hell is wrong with alien girl's freak kid?"

Amityville dollhouse strikes again.

"This never gets old!"

"Oh COME ON!!!!"

"You don't have a flower. We've been over this a hundred times if we've done it once. It's not rocket science."

Virginia has the science building opportunity, so I try to send her ass over there.

But there is no option for her to resurrect Stella. It's like the game doesn't even recognize the opportunity. Damn it.

"Heh-heh. Ain't that a bitch?"

Oh shut up. I'll bring her back one way or another, but first.

"I'm bored."

Sure. Go for it.

"Happy Sunday, Stu!"

"You're a dick."

"LOL! Yup. See you in a few."

Jadzia: "I'm gonna go play somewhere else if that's cool."

Lester: "Poor Virginia, she's going to be so sad."

Tyler: "You're a fucking idiot."

Of course Stuart comes back.

But not for long.

"Who the fuck was it this time?"

No one. You're finally dying of old age.

"Well that sucks."

"I'm not ready yet, Grim! I've got so many more sims to kill!"

"Stop embarrassing yourself, Stuart. You've had a long, productive life. Time to retire, old man."

Stuart finally stays dead. A total of 59 lifetime kills, a good run but not enough to topple Elvis and Thomas. We'll see where Tyler ends up.

Here's the generation 8 kill tally.

Elvis: 76

Thomas: 67

Tyler: 61 (Damn, son!! I did not expect him to be ahead.)

Stuart: 46 (59)

Lydia: 53

Jason: 38

Alex: 17 (33)

Stella: 26 (10 of which were from her teenage years)

Tesla: 22

Zed: 17

Sebastian: 16

Barb: 11

Virginia: 9 (6 as a teenager)

Blaine: 9

Shane: 6

Tango Jr.: 5 (all family members, at least 3 of which were Stella)

Julia: 4

Jeanette: 3

Marie: 2

Mary: 1

Max: 1