Kris: "So......... what are we all looking at?"
Gnubb: "............................................................."
Last chapter, Alex and Stewie took a vacation to France. There was plenty of action. Both got some of the woohoo variety, and Stewie of the Dexter Bear variety. Stewie had brutally murdered Manon and Colette when he set his sights on Edith Morel, wife of Gerard, mother of Pascal. He decided to save Edith a divorce by making her a widow instead. At that point, Champs Les Sims said enough was enough and deported Stewie's ass. He disappeared from Champs Les Sims and the portrait bar but is still showing up in Alex's family tree. Alex was all..
but I made him go home early anyway, to make sure that Stewie still exists.
**new save and a shit ton of loading later**
"I thought they sold the car?"
"They did, I stole it back."
"Wait, so you got the car back but we get to keep the money we made from selling it?"
"Yep."
"You know, Stuart, you're not too bad, overall."
"Lost everything else in my inventory, though."
"What did you have?"
"All the souvenirs I bought, the tent, a scooter, a bottle of nectar I got from the nectary. I think I had a book, too."
"Eh, no big. I bought a tent and a scooter, too. And a bottle of nectar, so we didn't really lose much. You got the car back and that's what really matters as far as I'm concerned."
So yeah, when Alex arrived in Sunset Valley, Stewie was waiting in the MV. He did lose everything else in his inventory, so that's important to remember for next time. Thankfully he's unlucky, so he didn't have a death flower. And Alex had the collection helper, so nothing was lost that really needed replacing or couldn't be replaced.
"Well, all's well that ends well. It was a fun trip, I guess."
Hmm, grab an overnight bag, you're going back.
"I am?"
You are.
"But...."
Just wait there for a couple of minutes. Don't go anywhere.
"Why? What am I waiting for?"
You'll see.
"Is my Papa here? Maman does not have any photos but said he wears a top hat."
Right behind you.
"Bonjour, Papa!! My name is Celina, I am your daughter! I like cookies!! Do you like cookies, Papa?"
"What? You're my daughter??........ who's your mother?"
"Maman is Noelle Saint James. She told me that you and she met at the shop she used to work for. You bought a tent and a scooter from her."
"But ............. but that was just yesterd..."
Don't think too hard on it, Alex.
"Maman says I have to go live with you in Sunset Valley because they have schools there, and she says I must go to school so I can grow up and do something other than work at a shop serving tourists."
"Uh huh."
"I have heard from other tourists that Sunset Valley is very nice. There are beaches, and swimming pools, a library with lots of books, even a big park with all kinds of celebrations throughout the year! And snow!! Is there really snow in Sunset Valley, Papa??"
"Um.............yeah, there's snow."
"And cookies! There are cookies, aren't there, Papa? I do love cookies!! They are my most favorite!! I am so happy to go with you to live in Sunset Valley!! Are you happy, Papa??"
"................................................................................................................................"
Just get in the car.
*save, looooooooooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaddddddddddddddd*
"I don't know how I'm going to explain this."
"Is that really your house, Papa?? The one with all the rainbow colors?? It is so big and pretty!!"
"Wow! I like this house! Much more than my house in Champs Les Sims!"
"Who is that man? Does he live here? He looks grumpy."
"Who the fuck is this kid?"
Oh, he's a peach.
"Who are you, kid?"
"My name is Celina. I came here from Champs Les Sims with my papa. I like music! Do you like music?"
"Alex is your father?"
"Yes. Are you his brother?"
"Yes."
"Then you are my uncle! How wonderful!! What is your favorite music, Uncle? I really like Latin music. Do you like Latin music, Uncle?"
"I want to learn to play music! Maybe piano? Or guitar? I cannot decide!"
"She won't stop talking. Why won't she shut up? I can't kill her, can I? I have to wait until she's older. How long will that be?"
*sigh*
Celina Fox (nee Saint James) is Alex's child with Noelle. He hasn't had many opportunities for fatherhood and I'd like him to have at least one child.
Sadly, this one isn't going to last long. Our first Good sim. Oh you poor thing. I decided to leave her traits as is. Changing a baby's traits doesn't phase me, but it's not something I want to do with a kid.
Celina ended up picking her own bed when I wasn't paying attention, so she shares a room with Tyler.
"Tyler is dead!! He should have listened! He should never have tried to fix that broken dishwasher!"
Or he rolled low in the haunted house.
"Spoilsport."
"I love your glasses, Jamie!"
"*giggle* Why thank you, Stuart!"
While he lost just about everything else, Stewie got to keep the two notches Moran and Colette put on his LTW belt. So he's currently 2 out of 10.
"Sure, I'll dump my husband, the father of my children, for you! He's not going to be happy about it, though."
"Don't be worried about Cycl0n3. I'm not."
Girlfriend number 3!
"So what do you want to do for our first date?"
"Eh, nothing exotic."
I agree, not exotic.
"Well I'm starving! I think the Bistro is still open, want to go?"
"Nah, I gotta jet. There's something I need to take care of."
"Oh, okay. Well. Call me!"
"Will do!"
"Okay, what was I supposed to do? I picked up the dry cleaning, got milk, checked the mailbox, brought the trash can back to the garage,...................... shit I know there was something else.............. Dinner!! Right, I gotta make dinner. Fuck, I hope there's mac and cheese."
"Hello, Cyclone, or whatever."
"Not now, man. I'm starving, I gotta make dinner before Jamie gets home or she'll kill me."
Yeah, Jamie's who you have to worry about.
"Here buddy, need a knife?"
"Hee-hee, he dead now!"
TJ: "Great, I'm going to starve."
"Mmmmmmmm, mac and cheese."
"Make some for me!"
"Could you hurry it up, I'm kinda hungry. And tired."
"And I STINK!!!"
"I really don't see where either of your personal issues are my problem."
"SHUT. UP. BABY!!!!"
"Come on Grim, take me already! My ears are bleeding!!"
"This is gonna be sooo good! I'm starving!"
Jamie hadn't come home, yet, no reason to let perfectly good mac and cheese go to waste. He finished cooking it, and instead of eating it, ran out the door. He hadn't been kicked out, oh no.
Alrighty then.
LOL!! The stupid willow tree completely ruined the view.
"GOD DAMMIT THAT KID IS STILL SCREAMING!!!"
Bye Stewie! Get knocked up!
* A couple of hours later *
"He is the rudest, most boorish, sociopathic sim I have ever come across! You are taking him back!"
"Where is that bitch?"
"I will fucking carve her like a turkey!!"
She's gone.
"And I'm still fucking starving!!"
Sue: "I knew those pills Gunther gave me weren't vitamins."
What's wrong, Celina?
"I can't go to school."
Huh. I'll bet your dad forgot to enroll you, he's stupid like that. I'm sure that
"I do hope so, it is the main reason Maman wanted me to live here. I suppose I shall find something to do."
Go the library?
"What? Oh ...... maybe after this game."
I hadn't restarted since Celina's arrival from France, but once I did she went to school with no problems.
"Hey Jamie, meet me at the park, I've got something to tell you!!"
"What? You're not INTERESTED??"
"Pffft, fuck this bitch."
The one thing University made easier.
"Go fuck yourself, you ugly ass whore."
And that's how it's done.
What did you want to tell her? That you stabbed her ex-husband to death? That aliens are stalking her house?
That you're pregnant with another woman's baby?
Hell yeah, son! Not gonna lie, I saved right before the abducted moodlet counted off. I was willing to give it one restart if he didn't get pregnant. But I didn't have to, he got knocked on the first go round!
"Alright, who's
Seriously. The criteria, it is minimal.
"I got abducted by aliens, baby, which is ironic because you've abducted my heart."
Quiana: "That is the worst pick up line I've ever heard. I am intrigued."
Attractive reward for the win! I queued up a bunch of interactions for Stewie so I could go deal with this,
No clue. I sent him to the gym, then ignored him to focus on Stuart.
"I was talking to Darlene, I don't WANT a group conversation, SHARI!!! So butt out!!"
"That is fine with me, you crazy asshole!"
"Geez, Alex. Take a chill pill."
Alex is currently not in the market for chill pills.
"This will butt you out, permanently."
"Buh-bye! Don't forget to write!"
"You're not going to be investigating this, Dara."
Run Dara! You see the hammer! You've seen what he's capable of! Run!!!!
Sadly, for Dara, she's no Theo Simself. She did not run. She ............ stood there and watched.
"This poor young man, he's clearly deeply disturbed."
"Yessssssss. Where's Darlene?"
Oh come on, your nephew only has two friends and you're going to kill one of them?
"Who's the other one?"
........................... You know, I don't know. He doesn't have a job so it's not anyone he works with. Lord knows it's not anyone he lives with. It could be the maid, Not Hasselhoff seems to get along with him.
Alex does not care but at all.
Darlene: "I feel like I'm at one of the parties at Stewie's house."
Christopher: "I went to a Fox party once. I had a great time!"
Alex: "This is still unsatisfactory. Plus that idiot won't stop smiling."
Christopher does seem to be rather enjoying it all. Luckily for him, he gets to enjoy life a little while longer.
"*sigh* I was so close to ending my shift without a lot of paperwork."
"Dammit, I'm really hungry!!"
"Good evening sir. You're going to have to come with me. You're under arrest for two counts of murder, and one count of attempted murder."
"ATTEMPTED murder??"
"Yes, Mr. Fox. Trying to kill someone is still a crime."
"But ........... all three of them died."
"Not all of them, Mr. Fox."
Yay! Darlene is around for the long haul!
I would have pictures of the resurrection but I was too busy with Stewie.
Quiana: "Oh Stewie, in spite of having seen first hand what you and your family are like, I'd love to be your girlfriend!"
Number 4!
"Cool! Wish we had a little more privacy, though."
How not to eavesdrop, lesson one: You can only stand around doing nothing for just so long before it looks really suspicious, especially when you all are letting your food get cold.
Blair: "I know, these amateurs are, like, totally ruining it for me."
"You're ignoring me."
I'm helping you with your lifetime wish. You hit level 5 in the painter career so it's time to move on.
"I've never written a blessed thing in my life."
Well you're going to start. Tesla is now a professional writer.
Much later that night.................
"Time to find that grinning imbecile."
Zelda: "Damn, my man is sexy in those blue cow pajamas!!"
Alex was lightening fast, this is the only picture I got.
"Hey, you're that guy who killed all those people in front of the gym! Well, tried anyway. Grim let Darlene off the hook."
"Why aren't you dying?"
Maybe it didn't take. Try again.
"Your wife is really hot!"
"Hey! You're going to ruin my pajamas!"
"The nerve of some people."
"We're still going to do it, right? You don't seem to be dying."
"Yeah we are!"
*sigh* I assumed that the woohoo action was taking a while to cancel and that he would die when they were done.
"I can't get in. That means I can leave, right?"
Officer AlmostOutOfFucks showed up and everything, which to my mind means the beatdown took.
Or not. Or he's a sleeping zombie. Creepy either way, Christopher.
Take fucking three.
"This had better work!"
He's getting a reset if it doesn't.
"Zzz Z zz whazzat??"
"Man, what a nightmare! Dreamed I'd hit a tree on my motorcycle!"
"Hold on, something's not right."
Hey! He CAN make an expression that's not "braindead dipshit"!
"What? What's happening? The light? What is that light??"
"Zzzzzzzz I love flowers zzzzzzzzZ"
Finally!! Sheesh.
"*SOB* Poor Christopher! At least we had one last woohoo! *sniff*"
"You're welcome."
Grim: "That had nothing to do with you."
"Well, thanks for trying, Grim."
"It wasn't for you, I was trying to finish a cup of coffee while it was still hot, for once."
"Oh."
That? Does not look like your fiction novel.
"Fuck off and quit ruining my life."
Tesla is not appreciating my "concentrate a little harder on LTWs" idea.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!!!! Nice waddle.
"Damn, you got fat."
"Yeah, I'm breaking up with you."
"Oh thank god, I didn't want to be that bitch who broke up with her boyfriend because he turned out to be a fucking sloth."
It's too bad. They're soul-mates, in a way.
Meanwhile, in a different bar.....
"OH MY GOD!! It's that guy from Sunset Valley's Most Wanted!! He's in the bar!! Save yourselves!!"
He hasn't even done anything,
yet.
"ZOMG!! I get to arrest a Fox!! This is the best day of my career!!"
"It's also your last, Erika."
"See this? This right here? Is why none of us like you."
"Hi, Ian! How's it going?"
"Um.... it's fine. Everything's fine. Situation normal. How are you?"
Why did you come back, Ian? I thought you were the smart one?
"I don't want to get fired. I need this job."
"Hi, I need a teleport right quick. Thanks."
"Deeeerrrrrrrp. Wheredhego?"
Teleporting seems to work if it's far away enough, and the cop has locked in on them at the original venue. I have to time it so the sim makes the call before the "listen" action kicks in, but if they are already home when it kicks in, they'll just wait for the cop at home. And if they are close enough, like at the country club across the street in Riverview, the cop will just find them. Distance and timing seem to be essential.
This rolled right before the teleport, but I couldn't send him back right away.
"Yaaayyyy, mailbox!!"
LOL!! "Alexander" by Versace is back! Alright, get your top hat then back to the bar with you!
Ian: "SHIT!! He's back!! Call the cops!! He came back!!"
"You're not going to run?"
"I ain't scared of you!"
"Well, I guess what you lack in survival instinct, you make up for in good looks, Artie."
"Too bad it's all going to waste."
Going back in again, huh?
"I gotta man, somebody DIED!!!"
"Oh no, ARTIE!!!!"
"That dude forgot his phone."
Oh yeah, look at that. Eh. It'll find him. It always does.
Meanwhile, next morning,
"I'm NOT fat, motherfucker! I'm pregnant! The aliens pollinated me with their offspring!!"
"Oh my god you're kidding? That's what you're going with? Aliens got you pregnant???"
"LOL!! Mehmehmeh, I'm Stewie! Not only am I bald, unemployed, alone, and really fucking fat, I'm also crazy as fuck!! Mehmehmeh! Need some tinfoil there, Stew?"
"Fuck off, Tyler!! I oughta ............"
"What?? You oughtta WHAT, exactly??"
I'm afraid that you're going to have to wait on that, Tyler.
"Oh shit. HOW THE HELL IS THIS EVEN GOING TO WORK???"
LOL! You're going to find out next chapter, Stewie.
Coming up, generation eight comes a knocking.
Murder Tally
Elvis: 76
Thomas: 67
Lydia: 53
Jason: 38
Tesla: 9 (22)
Zed: 17
Sebastian: 16
Alexander: 9 (16)
Stuart: 12 (13)
Barb: 11
Blaine: 9
Shane: 6
Julia: 4
Jeanette: 3
Marie: 2
Mary: 1
Max: 1
