Thursday, March 23, 2017
G4, P4: So Much Fighting
SHANE!! Come and get your baby off the porch before he freezes!
"Do I have to sign for him?"
No, just get over here!
It's not terribly unlike using Amazon Prime.
"Awwww. He's cute but I ordered a green one."
As you can see, Jack was born green (and by born, I mean materialized on our porch) but quickly changed color. This glitch has shown itself in other games of mine and I think it has to do with that rainbow slider that showed up with one of the EPs.
Jack is Shane's son with Jeremey, although I'm not sure Jeremey was informed. He rolled even for both traits, so he kept the traits he was born with. I did change his last name to Fox after taking this pic.
Last chapter, Jason and Thomas went on another killing spree, with Thomas earning the "Longest Spree" card with 14 kills.
Jack is the fourth child of Generation 4 (ha!). His cousins include Jeanette (Julia and Robert), Lydia (Thomas and Lea), and Elvis (Julia and Sid). Jeanette and Lydia are children, Elvis is a toddler.
Jeanette and Lydia get along okay.....
Jeanette: "As long as she knows who's boss."
...most of the time.
"Heh. I scared the shit outta her. Did everybody see?"
"I hope nobody saw."
"You just wait, Jeanette. You just wait."
Jeanette is evil, but Lydia is mean-spirited. Jeanette likes to prank, but I think Lydia holds grudges.
"I don't like her, Dad. Why can't we get our own place?"
"Don't sweat it, baby. You and I are in this for the long game."
"I don't like chess that much."
"That's not the game I meant."
"I wish to make Lydia suffer!"
Normally I delete kill wishes the kids throw, since they can't be fulfilled. But Jeanette is minutes away from being a teen, so I decided to let her have this one.
And this is where the colossal fuck up ball really starts rolling.
Lydia: "Pfft. Screw her. I ain't cheering."
"Damn, did you get some ugly-ass hair! Well, I'm done here. Later bitch!"
"Oh, I don't think so you arrogant twat."
"Why can't I move?"
"Oh fuck. That poker isn't going to be used for the fire place, is it?"
Is it ever?
"Happy birthday to ME, Uncle!!"
"Damn, I am good-looking!"
Not now, Shane.
"Well, *whimper* at least this is still a really fun party!"
"*sob* Yeah. I'm *sniffle* having a great time! *sob*"
So I wasn't paying close attention, nor taking a lot of pictures, because all that's going to happen is Thomas will give Grim a death flower, for the fourth fucking time, and we've all btdt. Except....
Hold on, what the fuck are you, WHY ARE YOU DIVING INTO YOUR URN???
Grim: "He didn't have a flower."
WHAT!!??!!? I swear I gave him one! He got the science building opportunity fairly recently and I remember thinking "better make sure he has a death flower as he's the only who can't be easily brought back" and .............. it occurred to me that in the game, as way too frequently in life, I merely thought about doing the thing and never actually did the thing.
I am so not ready to give him up. He's still a really young adult, and he's my murder champion! Fuckfuckfuck. Somebody better get that damn opportunity and quick!
"WHY didn't you get me a present?? It's my birthday!!"
"NO ONE brings presents to ANY birthday party, you crazy miscreant! I don't even think that's a thing!!"
"I'm never inviting you over again, EVER!!"
"Fine by me!!"
That's Lea, Lydia's mom. So she'll be back whether anyone likes it or not.
"That asshole didn't get me a present, either."
"Please tell me this nutjob does not live with my daughter."
Of course not. She totally does not live here. And even if she did, she and Lydia would in no way, shape, or form share a room or anything. And even if they did, they would totally be BFFs. Everything's fine.
"Where's my present?"
"Present? Uh. Well. I made this snowman!"
"WHY DID NO ONE BRING ME A PRESENT??"
"I didn't know we were supp..."
"You shitwhistle! I'll fucking END you!!"
"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE AND DON'T COME BACK!!"
So ............ guess who rolled odd, and then mean-spirited for her trait?
No Jack, you don't get another trait until your child birthday.
The very next morning....
"Dad's in the house, fyi."
Thomas!! That was fast!
"You let me die!"
I'm sorry! I didn't mean to!
"Now I need to shower. ALL the time!!"
I know! I fucked up! Alright, I have an idea. Just DON'T go anywhere!!
"I thought I only had to make this gross shit after someone takes the urn to the science building?"
Yes, that makes the whole thing worlds easier, but weeks can go by without anyone getting the opportunity and I'm desperate.
"This one's a little green. Are you sure it's still good?"
Jason made the ambrosia. I kept putting it on the ground in front of Thomas as he floated fairly aimlessly around the yard. It's morning and I'm afraid he's going to poof away, but finally ....
"Hmmm. I am kind of hungry. I guess I'll eat this plate of food that keeps magically appearing directly in front of me in the snow."
Don't poof, DO NOT POOF!! Just eat the food.
"Eh, it's not bad."
Oh thank FUCK!
"Am I? ......... I AM!!!"
"I'M BACK, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!"
Phew!! I promptly gave him a death flower. Let's not do THIS again.
"Fuck all this shit."
Elvis ALSO rolls odd and mean-spirited. Damn! I swear the dice aren't loaded.
Thomas celebrates his resurrection in the only way he knows how.
Floyd is the immigrant who JUST friggin' moved here during Thomas' last spree. Welcome to Riverview, you poor bastard.
"What the hell is on your head?"
"Beh-ray. It's a hat from Champs Les Sims."
"I don't like it."
Lydia: "Wow this place is big! Dad's here somewhere."
So glad you're here for this, Lydia.
"Here for what?"
"No, I cannot talk right now. I'm right in the middle of something, asshole. Call me later."
DoucheTwins: "Whooooa, skull guy is glowing!!"
"Aw, hearts! Floyd loves me!"
Not even close.
"Okay, which one of you twat-waffles is Nathan?"
The one that doesn't think you're awesome.
Do notice that he's already filled all his wish slots. I'm so glad I managed to bring you back, Thomas. You are always worth it!
"Your hair offends me on a level I didn't even know I had."
Darwin: "*sigh* He's dreamy."
"That's right, bitches!! Daddy's back!!"
Sweetie, no one but Grim knew that you were gone.
Grim: "And I thought I'd get a longer vacation than this."
"Is my dad going to jail?"
Hon, your dad gets arrested a LOT. You'll see him in the morning, or that next day at the very latest.
"I've got an idea."
"Sir, I'm hungry, so let's just get this over with."
Here's the other two wishes Tom rolled.
Never, in any of my other games, have I had kids that fight as much as these guys do.
"And THAT'S just for being here!!"
"You're ugly and that top is dated."
"Who are you?"
So Tom is out of jail.
"That's for trying to combine the Victorian Era with the 80s."
"But, I'm being fashion-forward!"
"I don't care! I say it's ugly!! I say ..."
Tom, you gotta go. The police are probably on their way and you've still got people on the kill list.
He successfully got out of Dodge, and proceeded to move on down the list to Carlo.
"He's coming for you. Run while you still can!!"
"What? No!! That Thomas dude. He's going to kill you!"
"DOES IT MATTER?? GOD!! You people are idiots!!"
"I love it when the door is unlocked."
You can thank Twallan for that.
Take it when you can get it!
"You know, I think someone else lives here, too."
He rolled this while in jail, but Shanika is in this household.
"I think she hates me."
I can't imagine why. You're an absolute delight.
Meanwhile, in the other room...
"*sob* Poor Floyd! He never had a chance!!"
"Are you finished?"
"*yawn* Yeah. I guess. I'm really tired."
"Good. There's a game on tonight and I'd really like to catch the second half."
The missing paintings and graves showed up, finally. I'm hoping to not have to move again for the rest of the game.
Things are not quiet for long. Julia threw a fundraiser to help her get a promotion and, apparently, my sims have a skewed definition of the word "party".
I was not paying attention at all. I think they were arguing.
"You need to stop picking fights with the younger kids!"
"Oh can it, Uncle Shane! If they weren't such annoying little brats then I wouldn't have to show them their place."
"I'm tired of sharing a room with you rugrats anyway."
LOL! Julia gets the master bedroom because she takes care of the babies. Thomas bunks in the corner house with Jason. So Shane is stuck in the kid's room.
"YEAH! Now this is a party!!"
And we have the first death for generation four.
Grim: "Yes. And you stink like a middle school locker room in June. Go shower!"
Anyway, back to the party. It's Julia's birthday, so I let her have a cake so Jeanette's death won't be the only highlight of the day.
Elvis: "This lady is in my way!"
Just go around her. She's always got to be right in the middle of everything.
"Did she just change her clothes right here in the dining room?"
She's classy like that.
"Oh. Well then I'll change my clothes, too!"
Jeanette: "There you are, you little asshole."
I am realizing that I am going to have to pick one or two favorites among my mean-spirited kids, since they are already showing signs of constantly wanting to kill each other. I can see them drying up our death flower supply before anyone reaches young adulthood.
If it wasn't a party before, it is now.
LOL! And they're not being quiet about it, either. Perfect ambiance for a political fundraiser.
"You little shits are SO fucking annoying!!"
LOL! That's Lydia, not Elvis. Eh, she wished to beat up both of them.
Not that any of it hurt the party at all.
"There you are."
"What do you want?"
"I am so sick of you little bastards, all up in my face all the time."
"We're not exactly thrilled with you, either."
"You two need to sleep in that treehouse of yours. I'm tired of listening to y'all all night every night."
"Fuck off, Jeanette. It's our room, too."
"What did you say to me?"
"You heard me. Bitch."
And it's on!!
"Take that, you stupid little asswipe!"
"You're gonna pay for that!"
She kicked his ass again. I'll spare you the pictures.
This was autonomous,
"Dammit, I just showered."
I hate that their hygiene and energy completely drop after a fight. Not gonna lie, I use testing cheats to bring them right back to where they were.
"Where'd she go??"
I'm sorry sweetie, but it looks like you little guys don't have a chance until you're older.
"And that's because I still hate your dad!"
The older kids divert my attention just long enough for Jack to somehow leave the nursery on the second floor of the house, and end up in the garage rec room watching the romance channel.
"Dis much betta dan da bwok toy."
The ghosts are starting to hang out at all hours of the day. Warren, in particular, has been around for at least a couple of days.
"Oh for fuck's sake! Get out of here, you useless shit monkey!"
Is it terrible that I'm only just now noticing that Jeanette inherited a bit of her father's pointy ears?
Coming up next chapter, Jason has one last hurrah.